First of all, I would like to preface this blog entry with stating that in no way, shape or form do I intend to take any blame away from Dennis from being a deatbeat. I just wanted to, as a mother, discuss Dennis' wife. She too, is a mother.

Ive been trying to wrap my brain around her actions and behavior for years. I truly do not understand her. As a mother, there are somethings we do not except. There are standards and lines we would never cross when it comes to our children. As Mothers we sacrifice, move mountains and give when we have nothing left to give. Their priority is at the top of our list, always.

In saying that, I have to again say that I've scratched my head more than a dozen times when I've tried figuring her out. In her defence, I've never met her. I don't have any first hand, in person experiences with her. I do, however, have an office filing cabinet filled with "court" documents, transcripts and statements from her. Her own Mother in Law - "Quote, end quote" states she is evil and not too sharp. This, with my experiences, I have to agree with.

This woman has 2 children with my Ex. There is a myriad of reasons why he is my Ex. Not only did he leave me and my 2 children high and dry ( and I do put emphasis *high*) By all factual accounts, he is a very self-absorbed person. Dennis left us alone, with all "our" debts and said he was leaving the province to work. His parents gave him money to pay his child support and he spent it on drugs. He disappeared and never called or attempted to contact us even though he knew I was living with my parents who haven't moved in over 30 years. No attempt. Not once. But hey... he is good at making babies and not supporting them.

I just felt that I needed to discuss "the new wife". Until 2005 or 2006, when in court documents ( they state many different dates), they got together, Dennis was in hiding. As he prepared to wed his *blushing* bride, his first appointments were made with Duty Counsel. In these meetings he attempted to gain legal advice towards taking steps to "expunge" his child support arrears. I find it suspect that this happened at this time. Then in the discovery phase of our trial, Rhonda (a mother) fills out the information to be sent to myself through my lawyer. In transcripts she takes the stand pregnant and states (as a mother) that arrears should be expunged from my 2 children because "I have a better, easier life then them". Walk a mile in my shoes pumpkin, before you dare comment about my life. You have no idea!

I am convinced that Dennis is most likely a similar person today as he was when I left him 14 years ago. Past behavior is indicative to the future. He left his oldest child without emotional or financial support. As he did to mine. When the day comes ( Yes, I say *when*) she will be left alone with 2 children. At first she will be relieved and then over time as she watches her beautiful babies grow, she will wonder what they ever did to deserve to be treated so badly. She will attempt to reach out to myself and Dennis' older childs mother for support. She'll want a glimpse of some understanding of what kind of human being could abandon his own flesh and blood. Over the years I have had many conversations with the Ex that came before me. I think it's a natural response to cling to someone who knows how you're feeling. Rhonda must know that I will never help her as she has never been an advocate for my children.

I re-read her statements - her very own words in transcripts and realize how diluted she is. I know it is in her best interests to be on "his" side. Obviously common sense is not so common.  She states that it was abusive that my children stood in court with me. My son just turned 17! She doesn't realize that when my son was in court, he was same age that Dennis' oldest childs mother was, when she was pregnant from him. He certainly was old enough to attend court regarding himself. She obviously doesn't realize that for over a decade my son has nightmares, asked questions, struggled and been "broken" because of Dennis. He felt it the hardest because he had a relationship with Dennis. He adored his father. My son asked to be there. As a young adult that was dumped by his biological father, I think I wasn't abusive in allowing his request to attend. What I do find abusive and completely offensive is you, Rhonda.  Before anyone knew you existed, my children were born into this world.  They exist.

You did think to contact me but Dennis talked you out of it. (your words from your court appearance) I wonder why? Dennis has a way of alienating people from his life to convenience himself.

Lastly, I don't know how my blog is offensive to you. It is one Mom's opinion. It's my perception of my reality. My experience. My feelings. You being offended is a direct reflection of your guilt.